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Galaxia de Emociones

by Jackie Mendoza

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1.
Natural 03:16
No tiene caso controlar lo que viene natural con el miedo a fracasar no se puede avanzar Cierro mis ojos y escucho tus consejos Parecen algo lejos Son programaciones en mi mente de años atrás Pero cómo es que todavía dudo en mi misma Es tu cura manipular quizá ya es tiempo de separar y de revivificar No tiene caso controlar lo que viene natural con el miedo a fracasar no se puede avanzar English Translation: There is no use in controlling what comes natural to you Letting fear get to you there’s not much you can do I close my eyes and hear your advice It sounds so far away The programming in my mind from years ago How is it that I still doubt in myself I guess it's your game to manipulate Maybe it’s time to move on and revitalize There is no use in controlling what comes natural to you Letting fear get to you there’s not much you can do
2.
The city shut down Thank god we got out The plane’s about to land Wouldn’t mind being stranded out here with you 4 years in- our first vacation Walking out the 747 waking up in Maui feels like heaven Wearing N95’s- we take it in stride Not a beach person I admit But for you I’ll take a dip Let’s get Maui’d We don’t have a house I don’t have a ring but you’re the one I’m worshiping This might come off as tongue in cheek- life is one big white noise sweep We don’t have to go back The sun’s my Prozac pour you a drink, pass me the blunt Cannon ball, aquatic stunt Let’s get Maui’d Once you know that I would never ever leave you, no, I wouldn't ever want to Let’s get Maui’d
3.
Oh Cielos 02:26
Dicen Tu esperanza, suéltala y escóndela debajo de la alfombra Dicen Tu cabeza, inclínala hacia el cielo, no digas nada Dicen No somos culpables por incendios masacres de animales Dicen es tu propia responsabilidad-cambiar la sociedad Varias excusas para mantenernos callados Qué conexión tienen con la tierra si no prometen protegerla? Más veneno Más poder Nos engañan de nuevo Como puede ser Que derecho a la admiración, reinar sin corazón Dicen Tu esperanza, suéltala y escóndela debajo de la alfombra Dicen Tu cabeza, inclínala hacia el cielo, no digas nada Dicen No somos culpables por incendios masacres de animales Dicen es tu propia responsabilidad-cambiar la sociedad Que hacen arriba en esa plataforma Alta Fuera de alcance Más veneno Más poder Nos engañan de nuevo Como puede ser Que derecho a la admiración, reinar sin corazón Dicen Tu esperanza, suéltala y escóndela debajo de la alfombra Dicen Tu cabeza, inclínala hacia el cielo, no digas nada Dicen No somos culpables por incendios masacres de animales Dicen es tu propia responsabilidad-cambiar la sociedad English Translation: Oh, Heavens They say Drop your hopes and sweep them under the rug They say Lift your head to the heavens and hold your tongue They say they’re not responsible for the fires and animal slaughter They say “It’s your own responsibility to change society” So many excuses to keep us quiet What connection do you have to the planet if you don’t promise to protect it? They’ve tricked us again with venom and power How could it be? What makes you deserve admiration if you’re reigning without a heart? They say Drop your hopes and sweep them under the rug They say Lift your head to the heavens and hold your tongue They say they’re not responsible for the fires and animal slaughter They say “It’s your own responsibility to change society” What are you doing up there on that platform? So high up So out of reach Tricking us again with venom and power How could it be? What makes you deserve admiration if you’re reigning without a heart? They say Drop your hopes and sweep them under the rug They say Lift your head to the heavens and hold your tongue They say they’re not responsible for the fires and animal slaughter They say “It’s your own responsibility to change society”
4.
Pedacitos 02:53
(Verso 1) ¿Te incomoda ser tú mismo? Me lastima verte así Tan despedazado Eres un espejo De mi futuro y de mi pasado lo veo y se rompe en pedacitos te veo perdiendo el ritmo Trastornos de equilibrio Hecho pedacitos (Coro x2) No sabes lo que te mereces Es más simple de lo que parece No sabes lo que te mereces Es más simple de lo que parece (Verso 2) Tu valor es más que el oro Más alto que los rascacielos si lo niegas y te caes Puedo ser tu red de seguridad Puedes dormir en paz Puedo ver tus lágrimas Puedes desecharlas Entierra tus pecados en la tierra romper las cadenas En pedacitos ¿Te incomoda ser tú mismo? (Coro x4) No sabes lo que te mereces Es más simple de lo que parece No sabes lo que te mereces Es más simple de lo que parece English Translation: Little Pieces (Verse 1) Does it bother you to be yourself? It hurts me to see you this way So broken You’re a mirror of my future and my past I see at it and it breaks I see you losing rhythm Shifting equilibrium You break into little pieces (Chorus) You don’t know what you deserve It’s more simple than it seems You don’t know what you deserve It’s more simple than it seems (Verse 2) Your worth is more than gold Higher than skyscrapers If you doubt it and you fall I can be your safety net You can sleep in peace I can see your tears You can release them Bury your sins into the ground And break the chains that bind you into little pieces Does it bother you to be yourself? (Chorus) You don’t know what you deserve It’s more simple than it seems You don’t know what you deserve It’s more simple than it seems
5.
It's all in the hips and it’s all the waist, yeah It’s all in the fist when you raise it above your head You can call me a witch you can call me a lady but I don’t give a shit I don’t let it get to my head It's all in the hips and it’s all the waist, yeah Ya me canse Mi paciencia es un globo -cerca a un alfiler nací en un país-racista y machista sin saber Y eso es lo qué pasa Tengo hambre de aprender “Hay frijoles en la casa” nos quieren calladitas Que así nos vemos mas bonitas Mis padres me decían “hay que mejorar la raza, tenemos sangre española, sangre portuguesa, de la realeza” Pero escupe DNA en un frasco y te cuento del fracaso De propaganda religiosa Sociedad peligrosa It’s all in the hips and it’s all in the waist yeah waist It’s all in your fist when you raise it above your head Bienvenidos al circo Aquí guardamos la nostalgia Y por acá extravagancia oOo Detrás de la cortina un payaso en la política No apartes tu mirada Estoy anestesiada Se enojan si digo algo real Dicen que solo quiero pelear Pero ya estuvo Solo digo la verdad Tomo el asunto- en mis propias manos ya It’s all in the hips and it’s all in the waist yeah It’s all in your fist when you raise it above your head English Translation: There are Beans at the House (Stomps) It's all in the hips and it’s all the waist, yeah It’s all in the fist when you raise it above your head You can call me a witch you can call me a lady but I don’t give a shit I don’t let it get to my head It's all in the hips and it’s all the waist, yeah I’m tired My patience is a balloon floating towards a needle I was born in a racist and patriarchal country Without a clue, and that happens sometimes I’m hungry to learn “There are beans in the house” They want us to be quiet, we look prettier that way My parents used to say “let’s make our race better, we have Spanish and royal blood” But spit your DNA in a test tube it’ll show you the failures religious propaganda Societies so dangerous It’s all in the hips and it’s all in the waist yeah waist It’s all in your fist when you raise it above your head Welcome to the circus Nostalgia in glass boxes And over here, extravaganza! Behind the curtain we have a clown in politics Don’t turn your eyes I’m anesthetized They get mad if I say something real They say I only want to fight But I’ve had enough I’m only saying the truth Gotta take matters into my own hands It’s all in the hips and it’s all in the waist yeah It’s all in your fist when you raise it above your head
6.
Tu sonrisa es la esencia de la vida es mi honor analizarla Pero el código está en tus ojos Lo busco y lo encuentro Es un fenómeno estar tan cerca mi corazón explota como una estrella Galaxia de emociones Galaxia de emociones Galaxia de emociones Galaxia de emociones No hay herramienta para medirla mi corazón explota como una estrella Es un fenómeno estar tan cerca Galaxia de emociones Galaxia de emociones Galaxia de emociones Galaxia de emociones Miedo Pánico Ira Tristeza Anhelo Alegría Soledad Afinidad Felicidad Enojo Celos Simpatía mi corazón explota como una estrella Es un fenómeno estar tan cerca Galaxia de emociones Galaxia de emociones Galaxia de emociones Galaxia de emociones English Translation: Galaxy of Emotions Your smile is the essence of life It’s an honor to analyze it But the code is in your eyes I look for it and find it It’s a phenomenon to be so close My heart explodes like a shooting star Galaxy of emotions Galaxy of emotions Galaxy of emotions Galaxy of emotions There’s no apparatus to measure it… My heart explodes like a shooting star It’s a phenomenon to be so close Galaxy of emotions Galaxy of emotions Galaxy of emotions Galaxy of emotions Fear Panic Resentment Sadness Longing Happiness Loneliness Affinity Excitement Anger Jealousy Sympathy My heart explodes like a shooting star It’s a phenomenon to be this close Galaxy of emotions Galaxy of emotions Galaxy of emotions Galaxy of emotions
7.
Mousetrap 04:03
I went away with prayer beads on me, prayer beads on me I’m the one (I can bet) you could do without then (could do without me) Look me in the eye Tell me goodbye Oh it’s outstanding Oh, lookin at the bar, how low it is now Oh, the silhouette of a miserable excuse for a goodbye, so goodbye I wanted to reinvent myself for you I missed the mark (you can bet) I thought that you’d still be there (you weren’t there) I thanked you for inviting me in resented you for spitting me out Now I am wishing upon a star gazing at the sky how dark it is now the Milky Way is morphing into the smoke from your cigarette, cigarette
8.
Los hijos quieren algo de comer algo dulce de agave corren el los bosques sin parar Se esconden de sus padres en búsqueda de sus héroes escala montañas Sube al cielo en una astronave Baja de la estratosfera ya Sientes que caminas en las nubes Puedes apostar en el casino estratosfera Se desaparecen las angustias en el casino estratosfera Puedes apostar en el casino estratosfera Se desaparecen las angustias en el casino estratosfera English Translation: Stratosphere Casino The children want something to eat Something with agave, something sweet They run in the forest without stopping They hide from their parents in search of their heroes Climb mountains Fly to the sky in a spaceship Come down from the stratosphere now you’ll feel like you’re walking on clouds You can take a chance at the Stratosphere Casino Your worries disappear at the Stratosphere Casino
9.
I thought I was dreaming You are too that would mean you’re really here with me Two realities meet, it is bittersweet you spin me faster than the cogs in time When I wake, will I see through the haze? How do I outrun the train you’ll take? I thought I was dreaming Turns out you are too Hold me tight ‘fore light breaks through the fog I hope the next day you won’t feel some other way After all the lucid memories we’ve made The dizzy city feels like the countryside Let’s ditch this city for the countryside Forget the city forget the countryside
10.
I see the signs of the moon and the sun and the stars in distress and the world is perplexed why the powers of the heavens have been a’shaken So much fear has people fainting Who’s the one we can turn to? Where’s the light we run to? Stay up through the night just praying for the strength cuz finding an escape is too late now End of the ages coming with a vengeance Clouds turn to blood and the day is dark The sky is rolling up like a scroll, words dripping through the cracks of time like oil and water, good and evil Radio stations speak of revelations The powers of the heavens have been a’shaken and my heart is clenching I stay up through the night just praying for the strength cuz finding an escape is too late now
11.
3AM 02:55
(wow, ya son las 3 de la mañana) No sé qué hacer con todo el chisme en el party Bocadas de eso, se que te encanta ah, ah Hasta con pandemia no te quedas en tu casa Para de gritar, solo porque no aguanto mas de las 3 de la mañana Me prometí que nunca haría estas drogas Y que suerte que nunca se acaba Aquí vamos de vuelta Cada revelación merece un reventón Y que suerte que nunca se acaba Aquí vamos de vuelta Cada reventón es una revelación No sé qué hacer con todo el chisme en el party Bocadas de eso, se que te encanta ah, ah Hasta con pandemia no te quedas en tu casa Para de gritar, solo porque no aguanto mas de las 3 de la mañana Me prometí que nunca haría estas drogas Oh, quien es ella? Salio de la pared Y quién soy yo? No soy la misma de ayer Pasamos por etapas, disfraz nuevo en cada escena Lo único constante es tu amor por el drama Y que suerte que nunca se acaba Aquí vamos de vuelta Cada revelación merece un reventón Y que suerte que nunca se acaba Aquí vamos de vuelta Cada reventón es una revelación No sé qué hacer con todo el chisme en el party Bocadas de eso, se que te encanta ah, ah Hasta con pandemia no te quedas en tu casa Para de gritar, solo porque no aguanto mas de las 3 de la mañana Me prometí que nunca haría estas drogas English Translation: 3AM (Damn, it’s 3am?) Don’t know what to do with so much gossip at the party mouthfuls of it, I know you love it ah, ah You never stay at home even during a pandemic Stop yelling because I don’t wanna stay past 3am I told myself I’d never do these drugs again We’re so lucky it never ends Here we go again Every revelation deserves a celebration We’re lucky it never ends Here we go again Every celebration is a revelation Don’t know what to do with so much gossip at the party mouthfuls of it, I know you love it ah, ah You never stay at home even during a pandemic Stop yelling because I don’t wanna stay past 3am I told myself I’d never do these drugs again Oh, who is she? She came out from the wall And who am I? not the same as yesterday We go through stages, different costume in every scene The only constant is your love for the drama We’re so lucky it never ends Here we go again Every revelation deserves a celebration We’re lucky it never ends Here we go again Every celebration is a revelation Don’t know what to do with so much gossip at the party mouthfuls of it, I know you love it ah, ah You never stay at home even during a pandemic Stop yelling because I don’t wanna stay past 3am I told myself I’d never do these drugs again
12.
Silence 03:05
I wait in silence healing is there if I want it But I’m back on my old shit I can’t live without doing it, oh Life’s a gas take a hit How do you describe it? Can you even? The words are coming to me now or will they ever? Things are different now Can’t wait to get over it So much disappointment In myself I’m corroding in the silence I wait in the silence I could talk about my feelings Or will I try to keep ‘em in? I’m so used to doing it Oh, I’m trying to find a space to explore the darkness without being swallowed by self deprecating sharpness like knives and lightning rods made of steel I’m trying to find the peace inside for real I’m craving the silence Trauma trapped inside my noggin sound panels made of tin I ride it out cuz I’m losing it Oh, I’m trying to find a space to explore the darkness without being swallowed by self deprecating sharpness In the silence I wait in the silence I could talk about my feelings Or will I try to keep ‘em in? I’m so used to doing it, oh Craving the silence Craving the silence
13.
Quien te dijo que no hay lugar aquí para tus palabras, tus anhelos espaciales quien te dijo que tienes que ser así Vivir una simulación que no es un reflejo de ti Te lo crees Y qué estrés Te lo crees Y quien te dijo que no hay lugar aquí para tus palabras, tus anhelos espaciales y quien te dijo que lo tienes que hacer así Vivir una simulación que no es un reflejo de ti El sistema nos trajo opresión Y nos quieren en un rincón Pero no somos la nueva promesa sin fronteras, ya somos estrellas English Translation: We’re Already Stars Who said there’s no room for you here? For your words and for your dreams? Who told you to act this way, and live out a simulation that doesn't reflect you? You believe it and it’s stressful You believe it Who said there’s no room for you here? For your words and for your dreams? Who told you to act this way, and live out a simulation that doesn't reflect you? The system oppressed us and shoved us in a corner but we’re not the new promise, without borders we’re already stars

about

ZZK Records Presents Jackie Mendoza’s 'Galaxia de Emociones'

With her hypnotizing voice and vivid lyricism, Jackie Mendoza makes fantastical, intimate electro-pop propelled by ukulele-based dance grooves. Having grown up between her birthplace of Chula Vista, California and Tijuana, Mexico, the 29-year-old singer-songwriter and multi-instrumentalist bridges these two worlds with dynamic soundscapes that pull from Latin pop, electronic music, and indie pop. She creates a musical universe that exists beyond strict borders of genre and geography, giving her the space to traverse the vast expanse of her interiority.

Mendoza first started performing in 2014 as the vocalist for Brooklyn dream pop bands Gingerlys and Lunarette. She then broke out as a solo artist with her 2016 pop hits 'Islands' and 'La Luz', which showcased her imagery-packed, yet deeply introspective lyrics. On 'LuvHz', her 2019 adventurous debut EP that was initially inspired by a painful breakup, she turned her personal experiences into songs that observe greater truths about the world around her. As a result, the project became a broader reflection on varying forms of love, in relationships with your partner, your culture, and the natural environment.

Mendoza expands this approach on her debut album, 'Galaxia de Emociones' (Galaxy of Emotions), which sees her exploring a great range of feelings, from depression, celebration, outrage, numbness, hopelessness, and thrilling love. She uses each emotion as a portal to convey the intricacies of her experience as a queer, first-generation Mexican American woman, who actively defies and criticizes machismo and the Christian culture she was surrounded by. Brought up in the suburban border town of Chula Vista, she recalls being told by her parents to not mix English with Spanish, but speaking “spanglish” quickly became inevitable. It wasn’t until high school, that learning to play ukulele and singing in school musicals allowed her to authentically express herself.

“This album is about finding the courage to not only face my emotions, but also sharing them by singing them out loud.” Mendoza says. The project was co-written and co-produced by Mendoza and Rusty Santos (Animal Collective, Panda Bear), with a contribution from Grammy winning producer and accordionist Ulises Lozano.

As 'Galaxia de Emociones' cruises from shimmering indie pop to accordion-laced electronic norteño, Mendoza proves there is both power and tenderness in embracing the fullness of your being and not doubting your instincts that might have been discouraged by society. She says it all in the opening song, 'Natural', which blooms with spacey synths and twinkling ukulele plucks. “There is no use in controlling what comes natural to you,” she sings in Spanish in a spellbinding loop.

The experimental trap track 'Mousetrap' captures the bitterness of a separation, which prompted Mendoza to move out of New York City, her home of eight years, back to San Diego, where she grew up, during the start of the pandemic. Meanwhile, the off-kilter pop song 'Let’s Get Maui’d', portrays a dream-like, escapist vision of love, inspired by a phrase Mendoza heard while watching 90 Day Fiancé.

For every imaginative track, though, there’s another that’s firmly rooted in vulnerability. On the haunting alternative R&B song 'Pedacitos' (“Little Pieces”), Mendoza soberly reflects on how depression and addiction have affected her friends and family, some of which have died by suicide, and how that in turn has affected her. “You’re a mirror / Of my future and my past / I see it and it breaks,” she sings in Spanish over flickering synths.

'Oh, Cielos' ('Oh, Heavens') is a biting critique of the people in power who “[trick] us again with venom and power,” she sings in Spanish on the track. Similarly, 'Hay Frijoles en la Casa (Stomps)' (“There Are Beans at the House”) sees Mendoza refusing to follow patriarchal values. The song was inspired by the International Women’s Day marches and protests against femicides in Mexico, making for her most radical songs yet.

The album ends on a hopeful note with 'Ya Somos Estrellas' ('We’re Already Stars'), a glowing song that imagines outer space as a haven of belonging. “Who said there’s no room for you here? For your words and for your dreams?,” Mendoza sings in Spanish on the track. “It’s about immigrants, but also being queer and feeling like you can’t be yourself in a space,” she explains. “So I wrote that we’re all just stars floating in space, where there are no borders.” With her new album, she hopes that listeners can connect with her words and look within to explore their own galaxy of emotions.

credits

released March 3, 2023

All songs performed by Jackie Mendoza
Lyrical contribution on 'Hay Frijoles en la Casa (Stomps)' by Danny Parker
Accordion on '3AM' played by Ulises Lozano
All songs mixed by Rusty Santos
All songs mastered by Mike Bozzi
Written and produced in Brooklyn, New York and Los Angeles, California from February 2019 to June 2021
Album artwork designed by Juli Williams
The original photo used on the album cover by Marcos Rodriguez-Mallard


Natural - written and produced by Jackie Mendoza
Let’s Get Maui’d - written by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos, produced by Rusty Santos
Oh, Cielos - written by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos, produced by Rusty Santos
Pedacitos - written by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos, produced by Rusty Santos
Hay Frijoles en la Casa (Stomps) - written by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos, produced by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos with lyrical contribution by Danny Parker
Galaxia de Emociones - written by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos, produced by Rusty Santos
Mousetrap - written and produced by Jackie Mendoza
Casino Estratosfera - written by Jackie Mendoza, produced by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos
Dream Conductors - written and produced by Jackie Mendoza
Heavenly Sweepstakes - written by Jackie Mendoza, produced by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos
3AM -written by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos and Ulises Lozano, produced by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos
Silence - written by Jackie Mendoza and Rusty Santos, produced by Rusty Santos
Ya Somos Estrellas - written and produced by Jackie Mendoza

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